Only a creative Jamaican could think of this.
An Old Jamaican man lived alone in the country. He wanted to dig his
Yellow Yam and Sweet Potato Garden, but it was very hard work as the
ground was hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in
prison.
The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:
Dear Vincent,
I am feeling pretty badly because it looks like I won’t be able to plant
my Yellow Yam and Sweet Potato Garden this year. I’m just getting too
old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles
would be over. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me. Love,
Dad
A few days later he received a letter from his son:
Dear Dad,
Don’t dig up that garden. That’s where I buried the bodies. Love, Vinnie
The next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the
entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man
and left. That same day the old man received another letter from his
son. Dear Dad, Go ahead and plant the Yams and Potatoes now. That’s the
best I could do under the circumstances.
The Man RulesÂÂÂÂÂÂÂÂÂÂÂÂÂÂÂÂÂÂÂ - At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down
Finally , the guys’ side of the story.
( I must admit, it’s pretty good.)
We always hear ‘ the rules’
From the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered ‘1 ‘
ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports It’s like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1.. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are.
Don’t ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say ‘nothing,’ We will act like nothing’s wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, Expect an answer you don’t want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine… Really .
1. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball
or golf.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don’t mind that? It’s like camping.
Pass this to as many men as you can -
to give them a laugh.
Pass this to as many women as you can -
to give them a bigger laugh.
Toy Trunk Railroad by Erik Sansom
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